General Discussion

thoughts on coping with chronic mild d

feeds@yuku.com (bgbest) — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 14:15:27 GMT

Hi. Wanted to see if anyone has thoughts on how to deal with the chronic, mild, everyday problems with D vs times when one may be involved in a full blown depressive episode. My dh's D is more mild, but chronic. It can invade simple, everyday kinds of interactions and those everyday stressors can turn into bigger problems. It's rare that dh falls into full blown d episodes for long periods of time. This makes it hard for me to cope because it is difficult for me to identify what...

NAMI Grad I'm back! Oh no! Now it's my daughter, in denial!

feeds@yuku.com (erly bird) — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 18:48:43 GMT

Hi there! some of you might remember me from a couple of years ago when my now ExDG had a major psychotic incident and came here for support, of which I got. I also took the NAMI Course which also helped me understand mental illness and its facets. We've since parted and even though it was hard, I'm glad. There was a period of grieving which I got through. And now, after learning much about the illness, I didn't think about about my daughter (previous) who is 21 years old and who...

Where do I go from here

feeds@yuku.com (Oct09) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 18:06:30 GMT

I found this Message board yesterday and went out and bought the book. Making my way through it.
I have been married to my High School Sweetheart for 30 years this October.
We have raised 3 wonderful children and I was an at home mom for 13 of those years.
He worked on career and education during this time. We stumbled through all the parenting
mishaps most go through, like learning how to be a united front and sharing parental duties (as much as time allowed for him)...

its been awhile

feeds@yuku.com (mommy2three) — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 10:28:56 GMT

since I was here...its Fall so I shouldn't be surprised that I'm checking in here. DSO spewing negative stuff the last week or so and now I'm being told that its wrong to wish him a nice day in the morning, I'm no longer allowed to chide around,I am always right, I never listen, I am not a good person, you (meaning me) are all the reasons for the bad stuff ....you get the gist

I know the stuff he's projecting isn't about me...but ++$*, I'm just so tired...

Coping Strategies - anyone gone some?

feeds@yuku.com (NeilB) — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 10:08:19 GMT

Hi All,

Don't know where to start, but my story is so much like the ones I have read here on the board. My partner has been depressed, off and on, for several years. Until very recently I though it was all my fault, that I wasn't doing the right things to keep out relationship alive. She, only two weeks ago, ended up getting really down and kicked me out of the bedroom and said she was selling the house. She said I was making...

Need advice for coping with husband.

feeds@yuku.com (momof5) — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 20:10:11 GMT

I am a bit afraid that this is just going to sound like everyone else...but I need a place to vent!
My husband and I have been together for 15 years, and have worked through a lot of big problems together. Looking back, like a lot of people, I can see the red flags, but we had the best marriage I knew of.

Two years ago he had a series of job changes that cut our income by a third. At the same time, his mom, who had been living with us because of her Alzheimer's, had to go...

divorce is getting really ugly

feeds@yuku.com (njtrainer) — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 17:38:01 GMT

I had hoped that we could move along and get things settled but my DH is so messed up that he is not able to negotiate anything. He blamed me today of stealing something of his..I saw it on the seat of his car one day but not sure what day. He said I said I saw it yesterday, but that is impossible, he left before I left the house in the car I saw it in, and it wasn't there when I got back. Who knows..I told him I expect an apology when he finds the camera since I don't have it. He...

Co-dependent stuff/boundaries

feeds@yuku.com (cvw2020) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 14:57:29 GMT

Just needing to vent and touch base with others who may be able to help. What are some good coping skills to help me deal with a mother who tends to falsely accuse me of imagined wrongs? I suspect (non-diagnosed) she's got dementia starting because of other factors.

I think I'm just hurting at the prospect of losing mother slowly to an angry, confused fog but it still hurts to hear her lies and name calling. Despite 3 brother's who have done her so very wrong she seems...

Marriage Counseling: What to Expect?

feeds@yuku.com (pops7) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 09:30:58 GMT

Hi all,
Here's an update of my situation:

1. DW is on pristiq (dual uptake inhibitor) for 6 months, meds (Lexapro before) for about a year.
2. DW has had been to therapy sporadically. I have not been able to get her to see someone who practices CBT.
3. There are still swings into depressive moods with anger, irritability, hyper critical behavior. It just depends on the circumstances. The latest was right after my son's birthday party. The event was fun, and...

New here

feeds@yuku.com (craotmom) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 03:17:50 GMT

I'm very glad to have found this forum. It's a relief to read posts from others and think, hey, that's my life! My dh has been depressed for more than 8 years, starting with a breakdown right before child #3 was born. He was home for a few months, then went back to work. He was on meds and saw a psych, but the psych did not do much. He stopped seeing the psych after we moved away but continued the meds, unsupervised except by our GP. He gradually became more and more withdrawn...

Setting Up Appointment

feeds@yuku.com (justjayt) — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 00:13:38 GMT

After searching for quite some time, today I have finally found a counseling service that offers sliding fee scale counseling and is close enough to me that I can afford the gas. For this I am very thankful and has been a long time coming and very much needed. But when it comes to setting up the appointment, I don't know how to explain my reasoning for needed counseling. We're not together anymore, so I can't say relationship issues. I'm not even sure if they would know...

I don't know what boundaries I can make?

feeds@yuku.com (ozmummy) — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 18:11:01 GMT

Last year things came to a head and I said to dh I would no longer live with him while he chose to have inadequate treatment. That I would live with him if he 1. Found a psychiatrist and got his meds sorted out 2. Joined a support group for his addiction issues and 3. Went back to the sleep doctor he had seen 5 years before for a sleep test and get results/recommendations.

It was really hard, he still considers that I just threw him out and am controlling to make these boundaries,...

I'm not sure who needs the most help....it's been so long

feeds@yuku.com (ozmummy) — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 05:17:24 GMT

Where to start????

I have been married to dh for 14 years. We have been together since we were 19. He has been depressed I would say pretty much all that time. He was officially diagnosed around 1997ish after many struggles and heartache. His main symptoms are sleeping all the time, paranoia about other people intentionally hurting him emotionally, anger, feeling worthless and hopeless, also remembering events totally differently to how they happened (it's not me, I have...

Sister just diagnosised Bi-Polar

feeds@yuku.com (loveurwife) — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 14:25:01 GMT

My beloved sister who was once a devote church goer, motivational speaker, devoted wife and mother and an every day presence in my life whether I live close to her or not to someone who literally it seemed over night thought she was all of a sudden a lesbian, left her husband and her kids to live with her new hunny and of course doesn't care too much for God anymore and perhaps once month there will be a text from her to someone in the family and has gone from one extreme to the next has...

Please help -- Dbf has been in MDE for over a year and I need advice

feeds@yuku.com (mydso) — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 23:20:43 GMT

Hello,

My dbf and I have been together for about four years, and we consider ourselves life partners. But over a year ago, he got into a MDE (his third MDE since meeting me, but none of the others lasted this long). On top of this, four months ago he lost his job. He is in therapy and has an excellent psychiatrist but his depression is med-resistant and they're continuing to look for something that will work for him.

It has been incredibly hard for me, but I've...

The Depressive Cycle Recovery Phase...... Suggestions?

feeds@yuku.com (Hopefulcherub) — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 19:19:00 GMT

My partner has had two hospital admissions for depression in 8 years. In the past when he has been unwell we have done separate counselling then couples counselling and then when he improved these tapered off because there just hasnt been the need. Psychiatrist appointments started weekly and then spread out to every 6 months.

I am thinking maybe we shouldnt stop the counselling but spread them out as he improves. It's just that I have a SIL who sees a therapist whether she...

never hearing 'thank you'

feeds@yuku.com (sadpants) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 22:45:22 GMT

Sometimes I just wish my partner would acknowledge and thank me for all the things I do to try to keep her on an even keel. Reminding her to take her meds, reminding her to eat, to go to sleep, etc... she seems to resent that I feel the need to do these things, and I do understand that she sometimes feels like I'm parenting, and that she's also frustrated that she finds it hard to do these things herself. But day after day I get such hostility from her, when all I'm trying to do...

Gratitude Journal.............

feeds@yuku.com (Ange1961) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 21:10:10 GMT

Recently I was thinking about how I do my Gratitude Journal...

Im wondering If you would like to list five things your grateful for everday...
It can be inspiring to see what others are thankful for... and also inspiring to share what we are thankful for ..

So Ill start the Ball rolling.. BY the way . when I was in the thick of fallout .. a few years ago .. the only thing I...

This Message Board

feeds@yuku.com (fuffy0420) — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 14:25:45 GMT

I discovered this message board many, many years ago as I was trying to learn as much as I could about Depression. I had been living with my husband's d ever since I met him in 1987. We both had been able to handle it relatively well because it never really lasted much more than 6 months at a stretch. But over the years, his d got worse, lasting longer & becoming more intense. I was at a low point in my life when I found this board & Anne's books. I needed something to...

tell me that giving up is what to do, so so lost

feeds@yuku.com (mrbfjh) — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 20:31:06 GMT

Have to start by saying this relationship has an added twist to it, but i am desperate. I have been involved with bf for six years, we are both married to other people. We both were planning to divorce and be together. And then about three years ago the funk moved in. Always started around the holidays, he would be distant, start out of nowhere feel guilt. Not call for days. I would always take him back. But for the past year and a half I have been holding us together by a thread. He...