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This message board is for the friends and families of people who suffer from a mood disorder.
It is associated with Anne Sheffield and her web site
www.depressionfallout.com
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From a Depression Sufferer's Point of View
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insight into depressed mind
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Re: insight into depressed mind
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BluesNurse
Re: insight into depressed mind
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Dec 8 07 5:46 PM
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Dear Kitty,
This is my very first post to this forum, although I have struggled with depression for over 20 years. I'm in therapy, on meds, and thank God I have a supportive husband. We have been married 10 years and I *warned* him that this chronic illness is a part of my life; there would be good times and bad times but it would likely never go away completely. Bless his heart, he took the "in sickness and in health" vow seriously and has hung in there and done his best to cope.
That said ... I am currently in a rough patch and am reading a book called "Unholy Ghost: Writers on Depression." It is a great collection of essays from writers about depression.
Right now this particular passage sums it up for me ... and I've read it to my husband through racking tears. To me it is one of the best descriptions of what the depressed mind feels like, and what it means to live day after day with this devastating illness when, like me, you don't have the luxury of dropping out of society and taking the time to heal. We need both of our incomes. I am receiving treatment as much as possible but have no choice but to continue to work full-time and keep a brave face long after it seems possible. Still, I know I am not nearly as effective as I should be.
The essay is "A Delicious Placebo" by Virginia Heffernan. My favorite excerpt:
"Unless you are rich and can convalesce in a sanatorium estate ... you have to keep going when you're depressed. That means phone calls, appointments, errands, holidays, family, friends, and colleagues. For me, this is where things got tangled. Depression brought to me a new rationing of resources: for every twenty-four hours I got about three, then two, then one hour worth of life reserves --- personality, conversation, motion. I had to be frugal when I was hustling through a day, because when I ran out of reserves, I lost control of what I said."
To me, anyway, that is one of the best insights into what it feels like to live in a depressed mind. I hope it helps you. My heart goes out to you. Feel free to PM me if you need to talk.
Chris, mom to 4 kitties
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