Thanks guys. cleaning helepd some. I also did some drawing and that helped too. The hour and half long conversation with my motehr didn't, but oh well.

Only1hope--we don't have an actual plan. We discussed this breifly when he was here visiting. The thing is he is still at a place where he doesn't know what he wants in terms of a long term relationship. I believe it will work out but he needs to do a lot of work before that happens. So while I would give up my job next year and move back to where he is, I can't do that unless he is sure that is what he wants. I have a pretty close to dream job, so I need to know that I'm not putting my career into a train wreck to go back to living with him and being blamed for all of his problems. I don't know if that makes any sense.