Makes total sense to me jngl. Thank you so much for your insight. This is the thing though...you said...
"If I go ahead and take control then I feel like he manipulated me into ending things before I am ready."

It has occured to me many times....maybe this is what he WANTS. Maybe he wants to be alone. Maybe he doesn't want to have to focus on a relationship right now...and I question...is he waiting for ME to make the move so he doesn't feel even more negative feelings, like guilt? Do I want to be with somebody who is trying to force me to leave the relationship? For me, I don't think I do.

I guess what I am wondering is...If he really does love me and want to be with me and just needs to work himself out...isn't there another road he can take to do that, rather than pushing me away? Can't he accept that I love him and WANT to be there for him? Or is he pushing the envelope? Perhaps if I show him that he just can't do this in a relationship and expect things to be all honky dory when he returns, maybe the next time he will take a different approach, rather than push me away?

I don't think he did any of this to hurt ME per se....but depressed or not, there are consequences and results of our actions. I don't know. I know he's sick, but as much as I know about depression, I have never experienced it, and I just don't understand, just as those who have been depressed and have done this to their loved ones couldn't understand either..