But, the question remains...
Do YOU want him to come home at the present time? This should be a joint decision. Right now you are scrambling with a defense...rules.
Just saying, 'I am going to come and live on your couch' doesn't mean I will be allowed to do so...
So, are you giving in to his demand...which is what it is. It sounds like you are...sounds like you are now planning
on what to do when he is there. Has he replied to your email?

The Email has good set of rules if agreed upon...there should be a second, as someone pointed out...as to your own responsibilities. It is never one sided, relationships. But, again, it should be written when the two of you have sat down and talked over his coming home...not when he decides...he will show up.

I Became Insane
With Horrible
Intervals of Sanity

E.A. Poe