Repair the dishwasher, buy a new dishwasher, eat out....if only it were that simple. I think at the end of the day, the whole problem is which one will be right for you can only be decided by you. Yes, and there's that thing in the back of your head that keeps telling you that there is THE ANSWER if only someone would give it to you....there is a magic bullet -- a pill, a procedure, a plan, a therapist, a program, a perfect word...if only it were that simple -- we'd all have paid any amount of money and done just what we were instructed to do days, weeks, months, years, decades ago.

What Ange is getting at is, what's right for you can only be determined by you. What change do you need? Maybe that's the first thing you need to sort out. I know how you feel. Kind of overwhelmed. What you know is you don't want to be HERE any longer. That's a start at least. I think the next question is, what can I do to not be here anymore. All you can do is what YOU can do (sucks don't it) but once you give in to that being the truth, I think you'll find it liberating.

At first I railed against that, I fought it very hard. What was right, and what I wanted, weren't the same as what I thought they were when I began...that's what you'll find in therapy.

Yes, and you'll be doing all the work at therapy (that is how it should be). It's asking the hard questions, it's being honest in your answers, it's being willing to do something different to get something different. You don't have a plan -- just go, that an be the first thing you figure out together. Worry less about "painting a picture of any kind". Say what you feel. That in and of itself is important, and for me was something I not only had a great deal of difficulty with (still do), but will get you out of "coulda, shoulda, woulda" -- the ultimate trap.

Good luck -- you're further along than you think.