My H was raised in a home with some chaos with his dad verbally abusing his mom. At other times he bought her things and was obviously good to her. Rollercoaster.

The therapist feels my H's bad behavior is more likely a result of his upbringing (though I saw none of it 'til after D was diagnosed). Therapist feels that since H is on antiD it is not the D. H refuses therapy.


I bet he gave her lots of little guilt gifts. Hopefully they had enough value to pawn.

As for what he's done and will be doing, Lundy Bancroft's book "Why Does He DO That?" gives you all the information you need.