I do think that there are time they see it.. and feel it...
BUT .... to actually acknowledge it .. and accept it brings on a whole lot more guilt for them...
so I think in my exbphs case .. he tried to push that all down and not deal with those thoughts..
(I suspect in his talk therapy since leaving the last time he has tackled that guilt so he can move on a bit )

I know when he was in deep depressive episodes or mania he would not have been able to see how he was making me feel... or the affect it his behaviours were having on our sons etc.

Ange

Take  what  you  need . . .  leave  the  rest .Blue_butterfly