Shattered,

I would stand your ground on what you told him in the letter.  That you don't want to talk about any of this untill he has seen the doctor.  I agree you need space and you really don't want to jump into anything at this point. 

JB yours is in the Newlywed stage like my counselor told me about my DBF.  You might be right it will only last 6 months. 

All I know is we need to think about ourselves at this time.  They are going to do whatever they are going to do.  Nothing we can do about it.  Hugs to both of you and I wish only the best for the both of you.