cookie ..
I could have done things alot differently than I did.. but in the midst of it.. I couldnt see that .. let alone act on it..

when you push .. when you TRY to MAKE someone SEE something they dont want to see.. when you try to fix .. and fix .. and fix....
when they pull away.. when you push some more.. because your so scared of losing them.. yet you have already lost them.. in every sense of the word..
when you do all those things and more.. because of your own fears... because of your own needs... and neediness... you become just as dysfunctional as them... (and Im not saying You as in YOU ... I just mean most of us who go through this )

My relationship was indeed toxic in the end... for him.. for me... for our family...
everything became dysfunctional...
I was sacrificing myself to just be with him
i was sacrificing myself just to try and SAVE him .. FIX him..

so this .. to me.. when I look back now.. was toxic... our relationship was toxic.. and it was ruining all of us... ( my first word i put in here was it was KILLING ME.. but that isnt true... as sad as I was etc.. the end of my marriage wasnt going to kill me) it made us act like very different people..

Take  what  you  need . . .  leave  the  rest .Blue_butterfly