WW have have you discussed the fact that you had no intimacy for 8 years? Yes we have spoken at length. 

Did your wife realise it was your D and not you who was rejecting her advances.

Yes, and that’s why the advances are coming at full force now.

During our dry spell I wondered was he gay, was he low in therosterone, I had no idea that he was covered up D until his MDE hit last year. Can I ask what age is she? 37

Us women are conscious of the ticking clock.

I have even discussed this with my therapist.  I realize that my #1 concern for my therapist was my interests.  My therapist

1.    Never took a moral high ground

2.     Always showed me my options

3.    Always empathized with my situation

So she is concerned about my situation and how I can be in a better place to continue my therapy