Kaye, please dont blame yourself, this is not your fault. Can you follow up with your GP about how long you are likely to have to wait for the appointment? In the meantime, is there any other services you can use locally that could help? You must give yourself some time and space to get yourself back on an even keel, take whatever support and help you can to do that, your health and welfare is now the priority, you have to take care of yourself,
hugs,
Erin