I hear your hurt VG and you are right, once they have made that connection (wrong and all as it is) they are utterly convinced of it and nothing will dissuade them from it. In many ways its understandable, its easier (particularly for men I think) to see the source of their malaise outside themselves and blame those around them, or their job, their house, neighbourhood or whatever comes to mind. I know mine isnt coming back (well he's moving down the country so thats pretty definitive) and I am starting to accept that, its been a long road, but there are times now during the day when he is not on my mind, which is good I think. The last time I heard from him 3 weeks ago, I said goodbye, so I have accepted we have reached the end. It doesnt mean that the hurt and loss isnt still there, it just means that hope is gone, thats all,
hugs,
Erin