Erin,  I think the truth of the matter is, that on the face of it its over for most of us when D joins the relationship. I am saddened to say that
after 2+ years of crap, I now feel its over for me, 23 years of marriage down the drain !  She's ******  nuts !!!!

I am not sure if its because when someone does get their relationship back they no longer post here, bearing in mind how sensitive the whole topic is on here,
,I somehow doubt that, its just that there are very few who's relationship comes out the other side in tack who are still posting. It is interesting that its reported that
women suffer D more than men, but most posts are about depressed men , more likely that few men will post about their D SO.

We find this great site and find help and support and common ground, hoping that our relationship maybe the one to survive, we find the support and over time realise
that it is unlikely to. One post I read a few months ago was from an old fallouter of a while ago, not sure who now, but they said that their relationship had finally failed, after
appearing to have succeeded, but then normal' relationships fail all the time. But he or she was candid and suggested that as soon as D enters your life with your SO then run for the hills.

I was a little disturbed at the time, but came to accept that they are more than likely correct !!

From the day I started to get my head around the situation i was convinced that we would survive, this time it would be bigger and better, learn from our mistakes !! But sadly
I fear not, the message is here I guess' hope for the best, prepare for the worst'.

Sorry didn't mean to be negative, just need to vent somewhat.