Yuku free message boards
Username or E-mail:
Password:
Forgot
Password?
Sign Up
Grab the Yuku app
Search:
This message board is for the friends and families of people who suffer from a mood disorder.
It is associated with Anne Sheffield and her web site
www.depressionfallout.com
Depression Fallout Message Board
>
General Discussion
>
Is it me?
0 Points
Search this Topic:
Forum Jump
General Discussion
JUST CHECKIN' IN
Ask Anne
My Story
From a Depression Sufferer's Point of View
From A Friend's Viewpoint
Archives
Basic Information/FAQS
<< Previous Topic
Next Topic >>
Re: Is it me?
Author
Comment
gingernut
#1
[-]
Member
Posts
: 55
Jun 30 13 7:30 PM
Reply
Quote
More
My Recent Posts
I totally agree with all the above posts about taking time out for yourself. It's hard to start with as you know in your mind that you're filling a gap - a gap that you don't want to fill with anything other than your husband. I have been trying to 'help' my dp for months now because it feels like I should, but I know (through counselling, time and my own instinct) that I can't help him until he admits he needs to help himself. We try to think about how they want us to respond/reply/ behave so that we can support them best but we're thinking rationally while they're not. It doesn't work to respond in a rational way to an irrational thought. It's also confusing because how we would have once responded no longer applies as their behaviour and thought processes are so changed. The fact is, and it is so hard to deal with, (I'm not nearly there yet) is that we can't really help because the situation is so unpredictable. Sometimes I think, or he tells me, that next time a similar scenario happens I should do ...... and then when it does, he reacts completely differently. You think you're learning but you're not. Let the separation be a positive thing - I sometimes think that if we didn't live together I would be able to get a better perspective on things, I wouldn't be so emotionally exhausted, I could think about me, I wouldn't be there to be put down or have an argument started with, and I wouldn't have to answer questions about where I've been and who I've been with (this is a new thing). Don't give up - hard though it is.
<< Previous Topic
Next Topic >>
Forum Jump
General Discussion
JUST CHECKIN' IN
Ask Anne
My Story
From a Depression Sufferer's Point of View
From A Friend's Viewpoint
Archives
Basic Information/FAQS
Share This
Email to Friend
del.icio.us
Digg it
Facebook
Blogger
Yahoo MyWeb
Depression Fallout Message Board
>
General Discussion
>
Is it me?
Click to subscribe by RSS
Click to receive E-mail notifications of replies
Buy Anne's books