Hi Sully!
So sorry you have had to return here after such a long time! (but glad this place is still here when you needed it)
Im still hanging around, trying to offer support where and when I can. (im post fallout, although I do have my moments where i might spend a day every now and again, feeling those old fallout feelings. Having kids with my exbph, who are now adults, still kind of keeps us connected).

You ask if people go through life trusting their partners?
I know I did for 22 yrs. When it all turned to shite and he 'lost it', I was so shocked when he cheated that first time. Then we spent 3 years with him leaving and coming back, and cheating many times. By that third year, i knew once he had returned home again, that IF he cheated one more time I would be done! I knew this because I was able to cope better alone. We had been together since our teens, so when he got to 40 yrs of age and imploded, and cheated, it was something I never expected and I had always judged women who took their partners back after they cheated. Once I was in that position, and all i wanted was to have my marriage back, the cheating seemed the least of my problems. (low self esteem at this point for sure).

Im not sure if anything I have written will help... just wanted you to know that you are not alone and that I remember you.

Boundaries will be more important right now, than they have ever been.
If it's a deal breaker for you. Let him know that.
If you are not sure if its a deal breaker, then do some soul searching.

hugs
Ange

Take  what  you  need . . .  leave  the  rest .Blue_butterfly