Ellen,

I think it could possibly be because it's an animal, for one thing they don't talk and can't put them in any awkward position by making them feel uncomfortable and not bein consciously aware of their D. I know that sounds a bit funny but my XDSO was the same with the pet dog she had with her husband, she would miss her and want to go back to where they use to live and take her for walks.

My XDSO has not even asked about her cats since she left until most recently where she just said she would discuss taking them, okay so I know cats look after themselves pretty much but nothing was asked about how they were, nothing about their welfare all the time we've been apart!?

I know it's upsetting because they are putting energy into other things apart from us, expressing joy and fun with taking the dog for a walk is just them in D and doesn't surprise me.

As for the crush I think they put their thoughts to what could have been with other people as it's the unknown, it's like them moving on with other people thinking it will make all their problems go away which it doesn't, he probably sees this crush as 'what if' and had he taken that path with her maybe he wouldn't be in D when we both know that's complete rubbish.

Stay strong Ellen, your doing great, keep going... Hugs.