Blue Car I feel the same way. That I use this forum as a diary and don't lend as much support as is given to me because I just cant. So I do understand how you feel.

Please do not blame yourself. You did what you had to do for YOU. I only wish that I could be as strong as you IF my ex were to ever come back. What you did was very brave. You do not owe him anything. I know you are worried about him and I know you are hurt but its not your job to take care of him or make him seek help. Perhaps this will actually make him get help. But right now you need to take care of yourself.