I feel as though I am headed back to that slippery Slope which is too dangerous for me. I feel like suddenly I have built a life that revolves around check points of contact with him - meanwhile my life is tick tocking away

The problem of course is that I love him. The problem of course is that I don't know that he loves me. I am also not currently in a position to press him as you might do with a rational mentally healthy person.

In the meantime I found myself back in the Limbo. No contact with him was excrutiating. today it feels like contact is equally excrutiating. I am quite sure he does not give this nearly as much mental energy to what is happening as I do.

Vin - not depressed when benign? 'splain yourself