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Posts: 3071
Mar 5 15 7:21 AM
Not letting me walk the dogWe were out in the wilderness. Our objective was the top of a mountain. She knew there was only one opportunity to get something to eat. When we arrived the only food available had reached its sell by date. This bothered her and she told me we had to do without. Not wanting to upset her I did without. This meant there was a risk of not reaching our objective. It was the way she said it. It was the way she totalled dismissed the expectation of reaching the objective and I mean this. As if the expectation all along had been getting food and not reaching the mountain top.Bringing in what Oellen said about forgiveness. It was as if she had forgiven the outlet for not having fresh sandwiches and she expected me to do the same. Forgiveness is setting aside an expectation that didn't become reality to prevent it from hurting because it's impossible to fully discharge the damage done. Eating the bread and throwing out the contents wasn't acceptable to her because the damage was being done by the whole sandwich. All that mattered was the rightness of it and this rightness was a stepping stone to the rightness of reaching the mountain top.The details in the dog walking stories given are being given to try to explain what is happening and what can be done about it. We are being left behind so that we can lead a forgiving life***. We are being left behind to fully discharge the past, presumably because there's a belief that the good bits and the bad bits are inseparable. Her sitting at home and not walking the dogShe liked to walk a neighbours dog. The neighbour declined her offer because she was in the middle of baking and she didn't want the dog arriving back into the kitchen in an muddy state. She never asked to walk the dog again. She's living a life that forgives once, that cannot forgive for a second time. She forgives the mess she's created and once forgiven she cannot tidy it up which would mean forgiving it for a second time. She forgives the good she's created and once forgiven she cannot improve upon it which would mean forgiving it for a second time so it doesn't bother her that it deteriorates. She can accept being asked for forgiveness once, but when the issue re-enters her head it is taken to be unforgiving because she's unable to accept being asked for forgiveness to discharge the issue for a second time.
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