I've been glued to this site since mid June when my husband of 5 years (14 years together) came home and flat out said he wanted a divorce. He keeps saying he wants to be nice to me during the whole process and that I need to find someone "normal".
Our story:
We have always had a good relationship, we would get into little tiffs about very small things, but be over it and moved on by the next day. Last summer he was put on Zoloft for his social anxiety and then in December his doctor put him on Celexa. In May of this year he had kidney stones and after a minor procedure said he felt fine and didn't need his medicine anymore. So he quite Celexa cold turkey. He starting becoming more irritable with me and then on June 16 he came home and announced he wanted a divorce. Nothing has been filed. He keeps saying he wants to be kind to me, but he argues with me over everything, calling me every name in the book, I try not to engage in the argument. He claims the entire relationship has been horrible and I have never treated him properly. I never showed him respect or any love. If I do engage in his rant to ask him to stop with the name calling, he gets more angered and threatens to "destroy me" in court. He threatens to take the house, my truck and my kids away from me. That ofcourse quiets me down because out of all the things he says to me those hurt and scare me. He is Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, either extremely mean and then nice or the opposite with in 20 minutes time.
He has racked up $13,000 in credit card debt, wants to buy a home in Hawaii (somewhere he has never been) and has been looking on Tinder for people to date (he has never had a wondering eye and always looked down on people who cheated). He keeps telling me he doesn't want to be with anyone else and wants to be a loner.
I caught him in a lie the first week of August where he said he was staying with a friend but turned out he was staying at some girls house. He came home and acted like nothing happened. Why lie and hide it, if you are so happy to get a divorce? He was asked to move out that day, he was deer in headlights and teary eyed when I said that. I tried the No Contact between the two of us, we have two toddlers so I ofcourse keep lines of communication open for them. He is definitely a Clinger and doesn't understand why I want no contact with him. His anger and irritation has gotten more frequent and worse with me. He tells his friends and family he is the happiest he has been in a while and that he is just being nice to me to make the divorce easier on me. In what universe is calling your wife an idiot, etc being nice/kind?! His friends think I'm making things up and I'm crazy because he acts completely normal and just wants a divorce because I'm an argumentative person who brings him down. He still calls me his wife and every once in awhile he will call me by my pet name. It's so confusing because I get a small glimpse of my husband and then it goes away.
He is living with his brother right now and he has told me how he irritating his brother is becoming. He has also gotten into a few heated arguments with his boss. It ofcourse is his brothers fault, his boss's fault and my fault, we are just so controlling.
He refuses to go back to the doctor because he is fine and I'm the one depressed. Does anyone have any experience with their SO stopping meds cold turkey and behaving this way? I have read that Celexa can cause mania. Is that what I am dealing with or is it depression or just me going crazy?
TIA
Our story:
We have always had a good relationship, we would get into little tiffs about very small things, but be over it and moved on by the next day. Last summer he was put on Zoloft for his social anxiety and then in December his doctor put him on Celexa. In May of this year he had kidney stones and after a minor procedure said he felt fine and didn't need his medicine anymore. So he quite Celexa cold turkey. He starting becoming more irritable with me and then on June 16 he came home and announced he wanted a divorce. Nothing has been filed. He keeps saying he wants to be kind to me, but he argues with me over everything, calling me every name in the book, I try not to engage in the argument. He claims the entire relationship has been horrible and I have never treated him properly. I never showed him respect or any love. If I do engage in his rant to ask him to stop with the name calling, he gets more angered and threatens to "destroy me" in court. He threatens to take the house, my truck and my kids away from me. That ofcourse quiets me down because out of all the things he says to me those hurt and scare me. He is Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, either extremely mean and then nice or the opposite with in 20 minutes time.
He has racked up $13,000 in credit card debt, wants to buy a home in Hawaii (somewhere he has never been) and has been looking on Tinder for people to date (he has never had a wondering eye and always looked down on people who cheated). He keeps telling me he doesn't want to be with anyone else and wants to be a loner.
I caught him in a lie the first week of August where he said he was staying with a friend but turned out he was staying at some girls house. He came home and acted like nothing happened. Why lie and hide it, if you are so happy to get a divorce? He was asked to move out that day, he was deer in headlights and teary eyed when I said that. I tried the No Contact between the two of us, we have two toddlers so I ofcourse keep lines of communication open for them. He is definitely a Clinger and doesn't understand why I want no contact with him. His anger and irritation has gotten more frequent and worse with me. He tells his friends and family he is the happiest he has been in a while and that he is just being nice to me to make the divorce easier on me. In what universe is calling your wife an idiot, etc being nice/kind?! His friends think I'm making things up and I'm crazy because he acts completely normal and just wants a divorce because I'm an argumentative person who brings him down. He still calls me his wife and every once in awhile he will call me by my pet name. It's so confusing because I get a small glimpse of my husband and then it goes away.
He is living with his brother right now and he has told me how he irritating his brother is becoming. He has also gotten into a few heated arguments with his boss. It ofcourse is his brothers fault, his boss's fault and my fault, we are just so controlling.
He refuses to go back to the doctor because he is fine and I'm the one depressed. Does anyone have any experience with their SO stopping meds cold turkey and behaving this way? I have read that Celexa can cause mania. Is that what I am dealing with or is it depression or just me going crazy?
TIA




