Hey everyone.. I am sorry to see so many people going through so much pain.. I have stumbled across this website after buying Ann's book.. Here is my dilemma..
my husband of 5 years (been together 15) has walked out after 9 months of withdrawing from me. We have 2 children. I know I have caused this because I booked a holiday for me and the children and he refuses to go and so now he has to tell everyone and so he's said he can't go on anymore and it's over. I think he's depressed because a lot of what he says doesn't make sense, he's locating all the problems with me saying I never made him feel the way I should have and he never spoke up so it's all his fault but now it's too late. He withdrew intimacy from me 7 months ago but has reached out a handful of times since but now says it wasn't a connection it was a mistake. He now says he just wants to be my friend. Everytime we talked he would say he wanted to leave but then now hes telling me he has been trying to make it work but didnt want to tell me.. I have been through hell and back, each day wondering if it would be the last, desperate for his love and attention. When I see him I am in absolute agony as I miss us terribly. But now he has said it's over and he won't get help, won't see a therapist, won't see the GP. He said he likes the way it hurts sometimes.
But what if it's not depression, what if has just fallen out of love with me and not had the courage to leave before? I've stuck by him constantly but if it isn't I must let him go and stop trying to fight.
my husband of 5 years (been together 15) has walked out after 9 months of withdrawing from me. We have 2 children. I know I have caused this because I booked a holiday for me and the children and he refuses to go and so now he has to tell everyone and so he's said he can't go on anymore and it's over. I think he's depressed because a lot of what he says doesn't make sense, he's locating all the problems with me saying I never made him feel the way I should have and he never spoke up so it's all his fault but now it's too late. He withdrew intimacy from me 7 months ago but has reached out a handful of times since but now says it wasn't a connection it was a mistake. He now says he just wants to be my friend. Everytime we talked he would say he wanted to leave but then now hes telling me he has been trying to make it work but didnt want to tell me.. I have been through hell and back, each day wondering if it would be the last, desperate for his love and attention. When I see him I am in absolute agony as I miss us terribly. But now he has said it's over and he won't get help, won't see a therapist, won't see the GP. He said he likes the way it hurts sometimes.
But what if it's not depression, what if has just fallen out of love with me and not had the courage to leave before? I've stuck by him constantly but if it isn't I must let him go and stop trying to fight.




